finally... Moody...

No, I am not in a bad mood, as the title of this post could possibly suggest. My application to Moody was received by the early deadline, and I have received a response. Brittany had been telling me that the 14th of this month was the day we were supposed to hear from them so I had been looking out the window every fifteen minutes or so checking to see if the mail had come. Of course the mailman was late that day (last Tuesday), later than ever actually, and I was just about to leave for work. Willie called me, we were chatting, I checked to see if the flag was down one more time, and, yes it was. I got the mail, rifled through the letters, and there it was, MOODY BIBLE INSTITUTE. Willie was excitedly telling me to open it, and some of me didn't want to, but of course I really did, so here it is, you can read for yourself (once opened, click on the expand button on the lower right corner of the picture to make it readable)...

Ahh, yes, the proverbial HOWEVER. When I was reading the letter (out loud so Willie could hear) I paused at However, and my heart sank. Willie said something too, I can't remember what, but it was somber. I thought that was it. My legs were weak, my stomach was a little upside down, and I was instantly saddened. Of course I kept reading and was relieved, but the feeling of shock didn't subside instantly. Partially because I have wanted to know for so long and had been looking forward to that day when the letter would come.

So, now, I am still waiting. Of course I wish I weren't, but it has caused me to dive deeper into the depths of Gods sovereignty and trusting His plan for my life. If anything, even if I don't get accepted, I have learned through this how well I am at deceiving myself. I have been telling everyone and thinking to myself how it isn't that big of a deal if I'm not accepted. I realize from my initial reaction that I have been telling myself those lies in an attempt to protect my heart, something I do in many areas of my life. So I have learned I need to be more honest with myself and others. I am no stoic, I care much whether I am accepted, but all I can say and pray is, Lord, Thy will be done.